From Secrecy to Connection in an Open Adoption

Dear Strong Mama,


Thinking about adoption? Whether you’re weighing options like open adoption vs. closed adoption or deep in the trenches of this emotional journey, there’s something exciting brewing: the future of open adoption. This isn’t just a new trend; it’s a beautiful revolution, shining light on love, transparency, and building families in ways we wouldn’t have dreamt of before.



Think of it like this: adoption used to be a one-way street, sealed tight with secrecy. But now? We’re opening the windows, letting light and love flood in. It’s about knowing, not hiding. And guess what? Both you and the adoptive family are going to love the possibilities.

For you, as the birth mother, these are just a few of the advantages:

  • Peace of mind: Knowing your child is loved and thriving in a supportive family is the ultimate balm for your soul. Open adoption lets you see your beautiful baby’s first steps, hear their laughter, and witness their unique spirit blossom through photos, letters, or even visits.
  • Closure and healing: Hiding a part of your story can weigh heavy. Open adoption lets you acknowledge your journey, embrace your strength, and find peace with your decision. This post-adoption contact can be a powerful tool for healing and understanding.
  • Connection and belonging: You’re not a lone island. Open adoption can connect you to a community of birth mothers and adoptive families who understand your journey. You’ll find support, empathy, and maybe even lifelong friendships.

For the adoptive family, these are just a few of the advantages:

  • Understanding their child: Open adoption helps them answer those “why” questions that inevitably pop up. Knowing your family history, talents, and interests gives them a richer tapestry to weave into their child’s story.
  • Building a stronger bond: Open communication fosters trust and respect. It allows them to express gratitude to you and navigate any complex emotions that might arise. This can be especially helpful for older children adopted from foster care who may have pre-existing relationships with biological family members.
  • Creating a more complete family: Open adoption expands their family circle, enriching their lives with additional love and support. It’s a win-win for everyone!

Remember, open adoption comes in a spectrum of possibilities, from letters and photos to visits and video calls. You get to choose the level of contact that feels right for you and your child.

We often suggest that our adoptive families and birth mothers connect through a confidential computer app called OurHeartsConnect. It’s an easy way to share.


This is your story, and you get to write it with strength and grace, knowing it’s shaping a brighter future for generations to come.

So, brave woman, take a deep breath. Open adoption isn’t just a trend; it’s a revolution. It’s about love, transparency, and building families in bold, beautiful ways. And you, are at the forefront of this movement. You’re brave, you’re strong, and your choice has the power to shape a brighter future for generations to come.


Now, go out there and shine your light. You’ve got this.